You don’t know me yet. You might know my name, my hair colour, that I don’t like apple pie and salmon (I know, I know- how can I be a genuine PNW Girl?). You’ve heard that I am patient, that I am kind, that I know which fork to use at the fancy restaurant, but you don’t know me, and you don’t know about me. (That’s a picture of me, up there, just in case you haven’t seen).
You’ll learn me, and I’ll learn you, and we might become family some day. But today is not that day. Today we are strangers, living separate lives in separate cities, held together by a single middleman who is at best an unreliable narrator, and at worst, a love sick pup with rainbows and unicorns in his eyes.
I want you to know I don’t want to hurt him- even if I end up doing it. I want you to know that if it happens it wasn’t malicious; I’ll only make choices that are the best I can for the both of us. I want you to know that I want to make this work- not just with him, but you too- because he loved you long before he knew me, and I respect that. That I want you to like me, but if you don’t, and it is everything we can do to force smiles in group photos and exchange Christmas cards, then that’s okay. I will make your favorite dessert when you come over, to smooth things over, even when nothings ruffled. I want you to know there are others that came before you, and that I love them still, but I am not afraid to love you too. I want you to know that I don’t expect you to warm to my family as quickly as I do yours- they’re a wild bunch, and part of the grace of you is a small escape from them. l want you to know that I am here. That you can call me. That I will answer questions, even if they are awkward and cause us both to blush. I will That few things offend me, but making him the middleman will drive me crazy.
And most of all, I want you to know me.
So here I am, at your disposal.
XOXO Sarah Mae